Snapshot Series: "Marriage & Divorce"

Snapshot27 "Marriage is not spelled with a D" Questions for Community Groups 1. What type of encounters have you had with divorce? 2. Why do you think God is so serious about marriage? 3. What are looking for in your marriage or future marriage? 4. What type of advice can you give the other people in your group about marriage? 5. How do you feel about God's view of divorce and remarriage? When the topic of marriage and divorce comes up in the church setting people respond in a various different ways and it all depends on their life situation. -Proud - I have a good marriage. *Good marriages encounter problems and Proverbs 18 tells us that pride goes before fall. -Guilt- my marriage is falling apart. *I am glad you are here because you desperately need to hear this. -Shame- I have a failed marriage. *Jesus wants to heal your shame and help you move past that and receive His comfort. -Fear- I don't think I ever want to get married. *It is and can be a beautiful thing that illustrates Christ and His love for the church. -Lack of concern- I am young and this is not on my radar. *Right now you are developing habits and values and worldview issues that will impact you future marriage. I am an older widow/widower and I will never get married again. Why do I need to know about marriage? *You never know. Text Mark 10:1-12 Jesus questioned about divorce. Vrs 1-4 The question was prompted by the Rabbinic debate and the issue with Herod Antipas because that was the region He was in. In Mark 6:17 we find that John the Baptist had charged Herod Antipas for marrying his brothers wife Herodias which was committing adultery. The strict view of Rabbi Shammai allowed divorce only if a wife were guilty of immorality; the lenient view of Rabbi Hillel allowed a husband to divorce his wife for almost any reason. The Pharisees thought Jesus would take sides in this dispute and thereby split the ranks of His followers. BKC Jesus challenges the heart. Verse 5. This passage is not saying that God bowed to the people and said "ok I will allow it because it is inevitable going to happen so I will make it legal" This command was written to protect the women of that day to not get killed because their husbands were divorcing them and therefore ruining their lives. So in essence Jesus was saying "your heart was messed up and I will not allow you to mess up this women (my daughters) life because you are messed up. William Lane says it this way..."Mosaic provision was made for the contingency of divorce, but did not itself say whether the contingency was right or wrong" Jesus teaches the origin of marriage. Verses 6-9 Marriage is not an invention of men, but a divine institution, and therefore is to be religiously observed, and the more, because it is a figure of the mystical inseparable union between Christ and his church. MH 1. Vrs 6 From the beginning. Adam and Eve was the first marriage 2. Vrs 7 Their new life together A. Isaksson “leave” and “cleave” were covenant terms and were later employed to refer to God’s covenant with Israel, Gen 2:24 3. Vrs 8 Two become one (covenant) Gen 2:23 “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.” This terminology is used elsewhere of blood relatives (29:14). This sentence and the story of Eve’s creation both make the point that marriage creates the closest of all human relationships. Henry Ford's when asked on his 50th wedding anniversary for his rule for marital bliss and longevity. He replied, "Just the same as in the automobile business, stick to one model." 4. Vrs 9 This should not be separated. Jesus teaches not to break the marriage covenant. Verses 10-12 My fear for many of you is that you are looking for or will look for any "good" reason to get divorced. Fifty years ago parents were apt to have a lot of kids. Nowadays kids are apt to have a lot of parents. E. Lawson. Three Views on divorce and remarriage 1. If divorced there is no grounds for remarriage. Ultra conservative view 2. Instone-Brewer Exodus 21 Negligence is grounds for divorce. Liberal 3. Traditional view - Immorality Matt 19:9 or unbelieving partner wants to leave 1 Cor 7:15 There are many "what ifs?" in divorce situations What if I was not a Christian when I was divorced? What if it is a safety issue? If you were coming to me for pastoral advice I would have to look at your situation, pray with you and help you come up with a plan to work out your marriage. (much information on the topic has been written but the Bible is not exhaustive in its treatment of all those issues) This is the heart of Jesus' teaching...marriage is a covenant instituted by God it is not something to be thrown away. Trouble will come in any marriage and the mandate and call of the Christian is to work those issues out. William Heth said I am convinced that Jesus’ goal would parallel God’s relentless pursuit of unfaithful Israel throughout the OT and that he would try to save a marriage at all costs. Hosea Many who rush into divorce eventually realize it was a mistake A study of divorced couples with preschool children shows that after a year of divorce, 60% of men and 73% of women feel they made a mistake and should have tried harder to make marriage work. People have no idea how much anguish and stress is caused by divorce. Dr. E. Mavis Hetherington in Homemade, October, 1989. As Christians we should fight for our marriages and work diligently on our marriages. As a church we need to come along side one another and encourage marriage. We are sinners in need of help and when two sinners decide they love one another and take the covenant of marriage they need to go to great lengths to keep it together. It may be miserable for long seasons. At those points we have to remember the forgiveness of the Lord Jesus and what He did for us and how we should live that out to our spouse. GOSPEL (Communication cards if you are having those types of problems) In closing to help your current or future marriage (our website) Wisdom from Song of Solomon by Dr. Allen Ross Practical principles in SOS to safeguard your marriage and have it bring glory to God Chapter 1 1. Mutual Adoration, lavish praise on one another through life 2. Long to be with one another Chapter 2 3. Reassure one another that that is the only one 4. Sense of place is together Chapter 4 5. Marriage has to be protected. No flirting and no open doors (foxes) can be inlaws, work, children anything that gets in the way. Chapter 5 6. Praise your spouse to other people. Way of safeguarding marriage The unfortunate thing is people complain about their spouse Chapter 6 7. At ease with one another Chapter 7 8. Recapture your initial love, relive that exciting time Chapter 8 9. Erase the memory of bad experiences. (She had a bad experience with her brothers making her work hard in the vineyard) Solomon was there for her emotionally The call to the Christian is to keep the marriage covenant.